So, this guys walking through the neighborhood when he sees a garage sale. There's an old man sitting outside with an old dog, and a big sign that says "TALKING DOG FOR SALE".
Slightly amused, he walks over and asks the man, "wow, this dog talks, huh?". The old man says "ask him yourself". So with a nervous laugh, he gets down on a knee, gives the old dog a scratch, and says "uhh, so.. How's life been treatin ya?"
The dog sits up and says "oh, I've had a very fulfilling life! I grew up on a big farm herding sheep. Then I moved to the Swiss alps where I rescued skiers and hikers lost in the snow. After that I did a tour in Iraq sniffing out landmines!"
Completely astonished, the guy falls back on his ass and stutters to the old man.. "this dog is incredible!! Why on earth would you want to sell him!??"
The old man looks at him and says "he's a liar! He's never done any of that stuff!"